THE POWER OF PERSPECTIVE

THE POWER OF PERSPECTIVE

I just posted a carousel on Instagram about the power of perspective. I felt so inspired to keep writing, to share a very personal story, and to give a few more examples. 

I honestly have to say I think I was born with some kind of optimistic force within me. It’s a drive I can’t explain. Some label it as toxic positivity these days, and I can back some of the arguments like being overly positive can be somewhat annoying, BUT there's something around the arguments about toxic positivity that doesn’t sit right with me, as in saying “ It’s toxic positivity, let me just be allowed to gossip” ….

One thing I personally can’t agree with in the "toxic positivity" labelling is: Why is it so bad to turn things to the positive? Just because you see things from another perspective doesn’t mean you can’t be realistic about your situation? Sometimes being overly positive is deeper than that; sometimes it can be a coping mechanism, and that IMO should be met with compassion. We are just all on our own journeys.

Over to my personal story. Back in October, I had some deep trauma and wound resurfacing; someone close in my family had fallen back into addiction. I felt I was re-living my past yet another time. Sure, I was in fight and flight for a few months straight. Sure, I had another big hair shed 4 months later, which was the second time in 12 months. Sure, I was fiesty, grieving and short-tempered. Sure, I talked to my therapist and still felt alone. Sure, there were times I felt like a victim and neglected, still at 32. Sure, I gave myself compassion. Sure, I was angry.

In all of this, because I believe that's what it’s really about, I’m gonna say it over and over again: It can all coexist. In all of this, I said to myself as a way to change my own perspective: I get to go through all of this again, I get to actually heal from this one last time. I get to maybe heal some wounds that I didn’t get to heal as a child, as a teenager, I get to heal this as a grown-up person. I get to set boundaries, and I get to ride the wave from start to finish.

And guess what, 10 months later: I can truly say I met myself - I put down new upgraded boundaries with love for myself, and I managed to truly forgive. I got a closer family connection that I didn’t see coming. Most of all, I’ve come to peace with that this will most likely always be present in my life, sometimes more than others, which I have accepted. How can I be so positive about it? I changed my perspective, I didn’t say "ahhhhh, why is this happening to me agaaaain ( well, I did when the situation was the most heated), why me, why does this always happen when I start trusting again? " In all of this chaos, fight and flight, I always knew: I have the power to truly feel to heal.

THE POWER OF PERSPECTIVE PT.2:

1) Why is my deep trauma showing up again, I can't be dealing with this now in my age? / / I have the opportunity to heal from this again, and I intend to heal some wounds I haven’t really had the chance to go through yet.

2) I hate my job // I get to work, many people don’t have the privilege. If I don’t like my job, I have the ability to go online and seek out new opportunities.

3) I’m too overwhelmed even to start searching for new opportunities// What is the smallest thing I can do today in this moment that will help me to help myself so I can have some space for looking for new opportunities?

4) We broke up, and I don’t see the light in the tunnel // At first, you might hate this but: Congrats. You just let in time and resources in your life to meet the person that is right for you. More time for you. More time to figure out what you need.

5) THAT IS WAAAY TOO EARLY // Time will heal, trusting in life. Trusting what is meant for you will find you. Slowly use the time to do good things for yourself, for your future self <3 Take time to breathe properly.

6) I’m behind in life // Time is a manmade thing. Time is not linear. Every day you wake up, you can choose how you speak to yourself, how you treat others, and every day can be a new blank page for the rest of your life.

Felt like making a playlist for you<3

Words are soooo powerful. What we tell ourselves and how we look at situations can truly change our reality.